Breast cancer causes an emotional upheaval, not only in your life, but also in the lives of your families. It would be fair to say that upon finding your breast lump and seeing your doctor, you, as most women would, enter a state of emotional shock. Women have said they feel completely numb, thinking
"this can't be happening to me". There is a roller coaster ride of emotions and various stages of grief for you to go through, now that you have possible symptoms of breast cancer.
It's OK to be afraid, it's OK to be fearful, it's OK to be in a state of shock, feeling disbelief, it's OK to be angry and to
want to cling to the people you love and pretend this isn't happening. It's OK and advisable to find support and to get the help you need, in order to get through these next few days and weeks, until you know more about what is going on in your body, and what needs to happen next.
Whilst waiting for your breast biopsy results and other breast tests to come back, time can feel as if it is at a stand still. Everything seems to take so long, almost as if in slow motion.
A dull numbness creeps over you and life looses its shine. This is replaced by anxious worry, stress, tears, fears, disbelief, grief, anger, desperation and many more emotions, whilst coming to terms with finding your breast lump.
Your husband or partner will be struggling to come to terms with your breast lump. In an ideal world, partners support and share with each other in helping to get through life's issues, but it doesn't always work that way. Breast cancer causes some couples to have issues communicating, so you might find it helpful to write your feelings into a journal or do some private family poems. Maybe talk to a close friend or family member. Understand that your husband or partner will be going through their various stages of grief and worry, and that's OK too.
Finding a way to express your stress and pain is important. Not everyone is able to talk through their worry with family and friends, and not everyone can describe their feelings fully. It is normal to find you are struggling to make sense of your thoughts, due to your very real and normal worry and fear of what your test results may tell you.
The possibility of breast cancer causes stress, and some children are able to pick up vibes off their parents, sensing distress and fear. Depending on the age of your children, you may or may not be able to share with them what you are going through. Try to keep your routine as regular as you can, so that your children have stability and feel secure.
If you have older children and it is appropriate, you may find talking to them helps to share your worry and strengthen you together as a family. Or you may decide to say nothing until you have definite results. If you do share your ordeal with your children, understand that they will go through their own roller coaster of emotions, being fearful and in a state of shock. It can be a good time to talk to professionals to get some ideas and support on children experiencing worry and fear. For some ideas with dealing with children check out
Breast cancer causes us to have mixed feelings. We regret saying things, doing things, or of not saying or doing things. We might wish to change some things if we could. We might wish for a second chance, or to make the most out of a situation that we didn't. Life has a habit of throwing difficult and emotional issues at us. Not many people escape without some life changing situation happening, at some point in their life. Live life to the full so that you never have regrets, should this happen to you.